


It's a Snake, Oh, It's a Snake

by psiten



Series: SASO 2016 Fills [24]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Tennis no Oujisama | Prince of Tennis, 弱虫ペダル | Yowamushi Pedal
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Brooms, Challenge: Sports Anime Shipping Olympics | SASO 2016, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Fluff, Gen, Good Narcissa Black Malfoy, M/M, Post-Deathly Hallows
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-07
Updated: 2018-05-07
Packaged: 2019-05-03 08:22:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14564943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/psiten/pseuds/psiten
Summary: Only a few more of my old SASO short fics to post, but they'll never get posted if I don't actually do it. So! A short bit of "Snamily" AU set in the Harry Potter 'verse,originally prompted in 2016by Blueminuet:Package: wrapped in brown shipping paper, vaguely broom-shaped (What could possibly be in it?)To: ShingoFrom: DadNote: Congratulations on getting into slytherin, son.





	It's a Snake, Oh, It's a Snake

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BlueMinuet](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlueMinuet/gifts).



> **Where is Snamily?**  
>  Snamily is not from a single fandom. It only exists in the very special reality of a Prince of Tennis/Yowamushi Pedal crossover that happened to gain a lot of traction during the Sports Anime Shipping Olympics, so to a certain degree, it is now it's own thing on a very small corner of the internet that is always happy to welcome new shameless shippers who like to solve all problems with, "Because Inui."
> 
> **Who is Snamily?**  
>  Inui Sadaharu, bespectacled data specialist from Seigaku in Prince of Tennis, paired with Kaidou Kaoru, who is also from Seigaku, and is a very durable snake, plus their Kinjou Shingo from Yowamushi Pedal, first season team captain of the bicycle racing club at Sohoku: a bespectacled, data-crunching snake.
> 
> **Why is Snamily?**  
>  Because we can. Because no one can stop us. Because it makes up for things we've lost. Because we're addicted to bad ideas, and all the beauty in this world. (h/t "Addicted to Bad Ideas", World/Inferno Friendship Society)
> 
> Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

     For as long as Kinjou could remember, he'd loved flying brooms. Kids weren't supposed to fly, but ever since that one time -- when his dads had given him a break from learning to walk and he'd snuck off to crawl into the broom closet then come back swooping through the halls -- his dads had decided to teach him properly for their own safety (and his own safety, he supposed). So when people joked that he could probably fly before he could walk, he got to tell them that it was the literal truth. Quidditch was great, sure, but his true love was long-distance cross country broom racing. He followed all the big races in the newspapers, and had posters of his favorite long-distance teams papering his childhood bedroom. Someday, Kinjou was sure, he'd be riding at the front of the Southhampton Scalebacks -- their flying ace -- and he'd lead them to total victory over the international racing circuit.

     But for now, he couldn't compete in anything longer than a secret neighborhood drag race, not until he was old enough to pass his official Hogwarts flying lessons. The beautiful Firebolt his dads had sent him as a matriculation present was bolted to the wall in Professor Malfoy's office, where he couldn't even look at it outside of lessons. Narcissa Malfoy was a fair woman, though. The Head of Slytherin always made sure that Madam Hooch had the personal brooms of Slytherin House riders in hand so none of them had to use the old, ragged, off-balance school brooms when they were training. A long weekend was coming up, though, and he was hoping he could talk her into letting him have his broom for long tours of the school grounds. Maybe he wouldn't be allowed to go alone, but surely with a chaperone...

     Professor Malfoy's voice echoed out of her office in the faculty tower. "You son is quite talented, and I have no doubt he'd make an excellent chaser. There is, of course, a precedent for allowing properly supervised, talented freshmen to join the Quidditch team."

     "I had no idea he'd shown an interest in Quidditch," a man's voice replied. And not just any man. It was his Ravenclaw dad, Sadaharu, who'd joked in his first letter to Kinjou that, "Apparently blue and yellow _do_ make green. Make us proud, son."

     Kinjou waited outside while Professor Malfoy explained, "I would hardly be surprised that a freshman hasn't mentioned wanting to try out for the team. It's an unusual honor."

     "Professor," his Hufflepuff dad interrupted. "That wasn't a question. My husband was one of the best Chasers Ravenclaw ever had, and I was Hufflepuff's Keeper the year we brought home the win. If our son was interested in playing Quidditch, we'd know. He isn't, and we didn't come here to ask for him to join the team. Shingo deserves the chance to practice flying beyond the usual introductory classes. My husband and I are here to find out what the options are."

     From the hallway, he could almost _hear_ the imperious stare that Professor Malfoy used to (sometimes literally) freeze blood in her Arithmancy classes. "My good sirs, if you came here asking this institution to create a specialized accelerated program for your son and no one else -- flaunting centuries of tradition that children are educated with their own year for the sake of their emotional and social development -- I must inform you that Hogwarts is not a place that bends over backwards for a ... a selfish whim! The schedules are set. Our teachers have enough work as it is, and I will not ask them to turn their lives upside-down for the sake of one child. We are running a school, not a resort lodge."

     As soon as he heard Kaoru, his Hufflepuff dad, hissing, Kinjou knew he had to act quickly. One of the hazards of his dad being one of the very few self-taught Parseltongues was that sometimes he started cursing in Snake without snakes even being around. Kinjou pulled out his wand and murmured a quick incantation over a blank scroll he had left in his bag from class. Makishima and Tadokoro would definitely forgive him for this, and hopefully Fukutomi, Arakita, Toudou, and Shinkai would do the same. He needed a few names to make this look good. While the spell ink was still fading into the correct lines, he rushed through the door.

     "Dad, Father, Professor Malfoy. I apologize for missing the beginning of our meeting, but Transfigurations only let out a moment ago."

     Professor Malfoy looked down her nose at the intrusion. She was definitely upset. Furrows had started to form in her otherwise perfect alabaster forehead, although of course there wasn't a hair out of place on her perfectly coiffed head. "Kinjou. You may be seated. Now, what is this?" she asked, taking the scroll out of his hands.

     "A petition, ma'am, from a small cross-section of all four Hogwarts houses, requesting permission to form a cross-country flying club. However, as my parents have mentioned, we will have to get special dispensation from the school in order to be allowed to fly, given that we are all freshmen. Obviously, we would be supervised by a responsible adult at all times."

     He put on his most innocent smile as she asked, "Has one of our Professors volunteered to supervise your little _club_ in their free time?" Her cold tone made it clear enough that she knew there was no such Professor, and he sat still while she made a show of examining the scroll. "I would have expected this petition to come to Headmistress McGonagall through that Professor. I believe she has a soft spot for Gryffindors engaging in unlawful shenanigans, however. Perhaps you should ask Arakita or Toudou to attempt to wheedle a favor out of her. Goodness knows, no self-respecting Slytherin student should be making light of school rules in such a manner."

     The Professor deposited his scroll very precisely between her wand and the razor-sharp letter opener on her desk, daring him with her eyes to keep going until he messed up. His dads were sitting right here, though, so he wasn't going to mess up. His Ravenclaw dad was even more terrifying than Professor Malfoy.

     "Ma'am. I would never think of bringing my request to the faculty, let alone the Headmistress, without asking for your blessing. Any request I bring to the faculty, as a Slytherin student, reflects on the dignity of this House. If my actions would cause you any trouble, I would--"

     "You would...?" she prompted, arms crossed over her chest and perfectly groomed eyebrow arched.

     Somehow, Kinjou guessed that, "Give up," wasn't actually the right answer. Even if it were the answer she wanted to hear, he wasn't going to back down when his dads had come to fight for his right to fly. He met his Hufflepuff dad's eye, and his old man nodded. In whispered Parseltongue, Kinjou heard him say, "Go on, son."

     Kinjou turned back to his Head of House. "I... would confer with my fellow petitioners, and hopefully you, about an alternate way to move our club forward without discrediting the school. There's no question that our interest in broom racing is a reasonable pursuit for young wizards and witches. The only question is how we can best achieve our ends."

     "You got that straightforward streak from your father, I assume. Still. I cannot fault your logic. That changes nothing about the schedules of our faculty. You'll need a chaperone, and you don't have one."

     "I'll do it," his Hufflepuff dad interrupted. "If you can't get a teacher, I'll come on the weekends."

     "I'm sure you will," said Professor Malfoy with a sigh. "Very well. I'll present this petition to Headmistress McGonagall on your behalf. Anyone wishing to join this club will need a permission note from their parent or guardian, and should no teacher volunteer their precious time to chaperone, I will put forward your father's generous offer. This is not a guarantee, Kinjou. Now, you may leave. I would imagine you need to warn your friends that you've made use of their names without their permission." She narrowed her lips at his surprise, and shook her head. "Every student thinks he or she is the first to hand me a hastily transfigured piece of parchment. I wasn't born yesterday. Dismissed."

     The three of them vacated the office as fast as possible, and since there were no other students in view, he didn't even complain when his Hufflepuff dad gave him a hug and his Ravenclaw dad ruffled what he hadn't cut off of his hair.

     "Thanks, Dads."

     "It was literally nothing on my part. You and Kaidou did all the work," said his Ravenclaw dad. "Nice save."

     His Hufflepuff dad bent a corner of his mouth into a scowling smile. "We're proud of you, son. Now go tell your friends you're about to get them in trouble."

     "Yes, sir."


End file.
